It looks like that old scam isn’t going to work any longer in Russia to try and squeeze out of green plant material that may be suspected as something a bit more serious. Russia’s head sanitary doctor, Gennady Onishchenko, has added regular old parsley to the long list of illicit narcotics…
Garden parsley (Petroselinum crispuma), according to Onishchenko, produces an oil that can be manufactured into a narcotic, so he slapped it on the list.
It’s kind of amusing to think how many drug pushers there are in Russian outdoor markets. And there are hundreds of drug pushers who are old ladies standing near the entrances to the capital’s subway stations. And they’re selling drugs in bundles! All stores, large and small, have turned out to be retail drug labs on a par with meth labs. All those people with country homes outside Moscow, as it turns out, are growing plantations of illegal greenery in their gardens! Sounds like the opium fields in Afghanistan. I can now picture millions of acres of parsley fields being destroyed and burned as growers are trying to smuggle their harvest over the borders to addicts around the world.
I don’t know, but I’ve never gotten a buzz off parsley and I’ve eaten an awful lot of it, especially in summer. I stick it in everything: salads, potatoes, soups, etc. I don’t remember ever getting the giggles. Apparently I should have been sticking it in brownies when we have parties at home. Guess it’s too late now, it’s illegal…
The Russians are now shaking their heads, not believing such news from officials in the health department. We all thought we enjoyed parsley, but as it turns out we’re just addicted to the stuff. OMG could I be parsley-dependent?!
So far, there’s been no response from the police if, when and how they would punish the tens of millions of Russians growing, producing, selling (wholesale and retail) and using parsley on a daily basis. I’m sure they’re guilty themselves of ingesting the drug.
I guess I’m going to have to go cold turkey on my parsley intake and switch to radishes as an alternative…until that becomes illegal as well…